At Least It's Not All Bad News
Feb. 25th, 2020 08:44 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
teddy_radiatorHello from your resident Eeyore. I realise that I must never make promises to myself, like "I will log more entries in LiveJournal this year", or "I will lose ten pounds this Spring", or "I will have a healthy winter".
I know that every January/February I generally feel awful. I have unidentifiable pains. I get depressed and paranoid about my health. All my hypochondriac triggers fire up and send me whizzing around like a whizzing thing. I become convinced my heart is about to peg it. Looks like Winter 2020 is shaping up to match all the others. I am having a terrible time with my heart palpitations/skipped beats/irregular heartbeat. For months it's just been ticking along nicely, and now, every time I get up and move - BAM! it flops around like it hasn't ever truly got the hang of this 'beating in regular rhythm' thing. It settles down fairly quickly, and I think it's a matter of med doses. I remember years ago![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
beffeysue advising me to reduce my dosage on the metoprolol, and it worked. I have fallen into a pattern over the years: 1/2 a tablet twice a day, upping to 1 tablet twice a day around November/December, reducing back down around February/March. I have cut back, and it doesn't seem as bad, but it's still annoying and tiring, even though I've been doing this for almost 20 years now. I find it dispiriting and discouraging, and it makes me so tired.
Of course, we have a regular doctor now, so if things continue to be noticeable (it is always happening, but during these bad episodes it's more frequent and the irregular beats are more pronounced), I'll go and see him. It's not as debillitating as it once was, but it still bugs the crap out of me. I have talked about it on LJ for so many years, and honestly, folks, I always seem to feel better once I confide in you. Once I write it down, it doesn't seem so big and scary as it does swarming around in my head.
On top of that, my mom is really unwell. She's usually a tank, just rolling on no matter what, but her RA is out of remission and her Lupus is ramping up to a really high degree, and she is pretty much housebound. This is something she absolutely hates. She is terrified that people will think she can't take care of herself (her mother, my Granny, was exactly the same way, until she broke her leg waxing her floor, using her walker as a prop - stubborn women, these I'm related to), but something's got to give.
One of the problems is her house itself. The steps leading from the carport into her house have always been steep, but now they are too steep for her to climb. We are working on installing new steps. Another is her washing machine. Mom is an award-winning procastinator and a clothes horse, and dirty clothes are piling up. The other day, I found out why: she has this HUGE top-loading washer, and even I can't reach all the way down into it to retrieve clothes. She's been putting it off because she can't fish them out. Does she tell anyone? No. I have to find out for myself. We can't really do anything about that at the moment, but we are working on that as well.
In the meantime, TheHubs™ and I are going over on Saturday and really give her house the going over, top to bottom. We'll wash all the clothes, clean up and make sure she has some nutritious food in the house. We also hope to install new steps, but that might have to wait until we teach ourselves how to install stairs. Why did I get a Bachelor's Degree in Music, instead of learning how to actually DO something?
Work continues to be meagre and dismal, but thanks to a work colleague, we learned about some freelance stuff we can do, which can supplement our income a bit. We've done a few and it's easy work, so until things pick up, we can at least add a little to the kitty.
But it's not all gloom and doom. TheHubs™ had his yearly ultrasound and Vascular checkup yesterday, and was pronounced still clear of blockages on the right side. She said that the left side, which had been completely blocked two years ago, has some movement now, mainly due to other pathways opening up. She still did not think it would do any good to try and open it, as it was badly damaged. She also told him that, while our GP is a well-respected doctor and she didn't want to contradict him, she thought that he was prescribing too much BP medication.
We also met with our GP before the Vascular surgeon, and TheHubs™' famous white-coat syndrom kicked into high gear. Before we left for his appointment, his BP was 128/65. At the doc's it was 177/65! Ten minutes later, it went down to 148/60. Our GP is determined to get his BP down in the 110's, and the VS said this was too low for Trev. She actually told him to back off on one of his two BP meds. TheHubs™ was thrilled about that, because he gets very dizzy during the day, and when he's not at the doctor's his BP drops very low around lunchtime. He was happy to back off the meds with the VS's permission. We have a lot of respect for our GP, but I think he was being a bit stubborn about this whole thing. All of TheHubs™' bloodwork was fantastic. A1C - 5.8, Cholesterol - 112, Glucose - 105, etc. Doctor D was happy with all that.
I've been ruthlessly slcing through my so-called 'Friends List' on Facebook, and unfollowing a lot of people. Mostly people I never interact with, never respond to any of my posts, spew tons of political or religious rhetoric, or just bombard me with political memes. I have been just as guilty of doing that in the past. Many of the people I've either snoozed or unfollowed for this reason are people I actually agree with - but the political stuff just works me into a frenzy and it's just going to get worse as November approaches. The best thing is just not to read all of it. I know what I'm voting for; I don't need to see all the wrongs of the world blazing across my feed to remind my why I'm voting the way I do.
Our son got married this weekend. It was a beautiful ceremony, at the Registrar's office in Sheffield, and we were there. At least via Facebook talk. Our daughter brought her laptop, and we had the best seats in the house. They even took a photo of the bride holding the laptop while we saluted them with some sparkling fruit juice. Most of the time, I think the internet is a garbage fire, but at times like this, seeing these two people I love very much marry, and go to such lengths for us to be with them, I can forgive it for it's shortcomings:
Isn't her dress beautiful? They told us afterward how honoured they were we could attend. THEY were honoured? Man, these kids of ours. Solid gold.
One positive thing I have latched on is the whole 'hygge' concept. It's a Danish word meaning 'cozy, comforting, grounding' etc. Some of hygge stuff, like IKEA, for instance, is of the commercial variety, and like Steampunk, it has core ideas and then you just springboard from there. Some people like the minimalist hygge, some, like me, prefer to be surrounded by our comforting items. It's all very personal, but the primary idea is to find a peaceful, cozy center of balance. I get a lot of inspiration from pinterest, of course, but I'm also finding my own way. I'm also itching to create a junk journal, but that's another post for another time.
Well, thanks for listening to me blather. As always, it does me a world of good to sit down and pour my heart out to my LJ friends, even if no one really wants to read it.
Stay fresh, Cheesebags!!
I know that every January/February I generally feel awful. I have unidentifiable pains. I get depressed and paranoid about my health. All my hypochondriac triggers fire up and send me whizzing around like a whizzing thing. I become convinced my heart is about to peg it. Looks like Winter 2020 is shaping up to match all the others. I am having a terrible time with my heart palpitations/skipped beats/irregular heartbeat. For months it's just been ticking along nicely, and now, every time I get up and move - BAM! it flops around like it hasn't ever truly got the hang of this 'beating in regular rhythm' thing. It settles down fairly quickly, and I think it's a matter of med doses. I remember years ago
beffeysue advising me to reduce my dosage on the metoprolol, and it worked. I have fallen into a pattern over the years: 1/2 a tablet twice a day, upping to 1 tablet twice a day around November/December, reducing back down around February/March. I have cut back, and it doesn't seem as bad, but it's still annoying and tiring, even though I've been doing this for almost 20 years now. I find it dispiriting and discouraging, and it makes me so tired.Of course, we have a regular doctor now, so if things continue to be noticeable (it is always happening, but during these bad episodes it's more frequent and the irregular beats are more pronounced), I'll go and see him. It's not as debillitating as it once was, but it still bugs the crap out of me. I have talked about it on LJ for so many years, and honestly, folks, I always seem to feel better once I confide in you. Once I write it down, it doesn't seem so big and scary as it does swarming around in my head.
On top of that, my mom is really unwell. She's usually a tank, just rolling on no matter what, but her RA is out of remission and her Lupus is ramping up to a really high degree, and she is pretty much housebound. This is something she absolutely hates. She is terrified that people will think she can't take care of herself (her mother, my Granny, was exactly the same way, until she broke her leg waxing her floor, using her walker as a prop - stubborn women, these I'm related to), but something's got to give.
One of the problems is her house itself. The steps leading from the carport into her house have always been steep, but now they are too steep for her to climb. We are working on installing new steps. Another is her washing machine. Mom is an award-winning procastinator and a clothes horse, and dirty clothes are piling up. The other day, I found out why: she has this HUGE top-loading washer, and even I can't reach all the way down into it to retrieve clothes. She's been putting it off because she can't fish them out. Does she tell anyone? No. I have to find out for myself. We can't really do anything about that at the moment, but we are working on that as well.
In the meantime, TheHubs™ and I are going over on Saturday and really give her house the going over, top to bottom. We'll wash all the clothes, clean up and make sure she has some nutritious food in the house. We also hope to install new steps, but that might have to wait until we teach ourselves how to install stairs. Why did I get a Bachelor's Degree in Music, instead of learning how to actually DO something?
Work continues to be meagre and dismal, but thanks to a work colleague, we learned about some freelance stuff we can do, which can supplement our income a bit. We've done a few and it's easy work, so until things pick up, we can at least add a little to the kitty.
But it's not all gloom and doom. TheHubs™ had his yearly ultrasound and Vascular checkup yesterday, and was pronounced still clear of blockages on the right side. She said that the left side, which had been completely blocked two years ago, has some movement now, mainly due to other pathways opening up. She still did not think it would do any good to try and open it, as it was badly damaged. She also told him that, while our GP is a well-respected doctor and she didn't want to contradict him, she thought that he was prescribing too much BP medication.
We also met with our GP before the Vascular surgeon, and TheHubs™' famous white-coat syndrom kicked into high gear. Before we left for his appointment, his BP was 128/65. At the doc's it was 177/65! Ten minutes later, it went down to 148/60. Our GP is determined to get his BP down in the 110's, and the VS said this was too low for Trev. She actually told him to back off on one of his two BP meds. TheHubs™ was thrilled about that, because he gets very dizzy during the day, and when he's not at the doctor's his BP drops very low around lunchtime. He was happy to back off the meds with the VS's permission. We have a lot of respect for our GP, but I think he was being a bit stubborn about this whole thing. All of TheHubs™' bloodwork was fantastic. A1C - 5.8, Cholesterol - 112, Glucose - 105, etc. Doctor D was happy with all that.
I've been ruthlessly slcing through my so-called 'Friends List' on Facebook, and unfollowing a lot of people. Mostly people I never interact with, never respond to any of my posts, spew tons of political or religious rhetoric, or just bombard me with political memes. I have been just as guilty of doing that in the past. Many of the people I've either snoozed or unfollowed for this reason are people I actually agree with - but the political stuff just works me into a frenzy and it's just going to get worse as November approaches. The best thing is just not to read all of it. I know what I'm voting for; I don't need to see all the wrongs of the world blazing across my feed to remind my why I'm voting the way I do.
Our son got married this weekend. It was a beautiful ceremony, at the Registrar's office in Sheffield, and we were there. At least via Facebook talk. Our daughter brought her laptop, and we had the best seats in the house. They even took a photo of the bride holding the laptop while we saluted them with some sparkling fruit juice. Most of the time, I think the internet is a garbage fire, but at times like this, seeing these two people I love very much marry, and go to such lengths for us to be with them, I can forgive it for it's shortcomings:
Isn't her dress beautiful? They told us afterward how honoured they were we could attend. THEY were honoured? Man, these kids of ours. Solid gold.
One positive thing I have latched on is the whole 'hygge' concept. It's a Danish word meaning 'cozy, comforting, grounding' etc. Some of hygge stuff, like IKEA, for instance, is of the commercial variety, and like Steampunk, it has core ideas and then you just springboard from there. Some people like the minimalist hygge, some, like me, prefer to be surrounded by our comforting items. It's all very personal, but the primary idea is to find a peaceful, cozy center of balance. I get a lot of inspiration from pinterest, of course, but I'm also finding my own way. I'm also itching to create a junk journal, but that's another post for another time.
Well, thanks for listening to me blather. As always, it does me a world of good to sit down and pour my heart out to my LJ friends, even if no one really wants to read it.
Stay fresh, Cheesebags!!
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2020-02-26 02:00 am (UTC)We're here for you! Hugs hugs hugs
I've been backing off a lot of people on FB too, plus I'm so busy at work these days and mostly go there for animal pictures and my book club
no subject
Date: 2020-02-26 02:07 am (UTC)mostly go there for animal pictures and my book club
I'm pretty much the same. Animal pics and hygge inspiration
no subject
Date: 2020-02-26 02:10 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-02-26 03:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-02-26 03:35 am (UTC)If I had to recommend a tough outdoor toy for dog people or horse people, I'm Jollyball all the way. Plus I can get good distance with the ones with handles on them.
no subject
Date: 2020-02-26 08:06 am (UTC)And you both made lovely attendees at your son's wedding. Way to go y'all!!!..I love you bunches.
Beffey
no subject
Date: 2020-02-26 08:54 pm (UTC)The wedding via the internet is so cool, glad you were able to attend. ;)
no subject
Date: 2020-02-26 09:59 pm (UTC)As for the blues, well, I suppose there is some good in knowing what to expect? I don't know. Mine come in and out all year long without warning and that is annoying in its own way. It's always great to hear from you!
xoxoxo
no subject
Date: 2020-02-27 12:22 am (UTC)Seasonal depression is a real thing, I have it, I hate, hate, hate winter. Coming from sunny south Florida is the reason, I know.
I hope your mom doesn't continue to be stubborn. I have decided that I'm just going to accept it when I can't do stuff anymore and let my kids and my young husband do them for me. :)
no subject
Date: 2020-02-27 02:24 am (UTC)It was lovely to see you post, and I'm sorry about the seasonal blues.
~hugs~
no subject
Date: 2020-02-27 08:27 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-02-27 04:24 pm (UTC)I'm thrilled you were able to attend the wedding from afar. You were a cute couple and so we're your son and new wife.
Cozy, yes! I've been taking down whimsical decorations in my Desk of Doom room and switching them out for comfortable things from other rooms of the house. I blame Pinterest. (I do like your decor pins there!)
no subject
Date: 2020-02-29 03:09 pm (UTC)I am looking forward to pics of your hygge-fied Desk of Doom!
Yes, Pinterest is my morphine, for sure.