If You Don't Like It, You Stop Reading

[teddy_radiator]

From my review basket on Lay Me Low today. This is review #477:

Derelict Author: I can't even believe the reception this story has gotten. Most of the characters seem so OOC as to be ridiculous (Snape using "lass" every other word, really?), the story arches are trite (Hermione asking Snape to marry her? Hermione getting almost raped but feeling super horny within a chapter!), the overuse of deux ex machina type spells/curses (the blood spell? Snape's "Dark Caress" curse?), and the "lyrics" at the beginning of each chapter? I read through this entire story to try and give it a chance based on all of the reviews I read, but it's just too OOC for me to even get behind it.

My Response: Sorry you don't like it. I'll admit it's not my best work, but then again, I haven't read yours, so I don't know what type of fiction you write. The wonderful thing about fanfiction is that not everyone has to enjoy every story. I think the fact that I've had a lot of good reviews on it is that is does have a lot of things that people like to read. There are a lot of stories out there I don't like. I stop reading them. I suggest you do the same with this one - it is obviously distressing you to the point of rudeness.

Well, one out of 477 ain't bad. So the author of Debauched, Dissipated, and Dissolute hates this story. I think I'll give it a read. I had hoped to be able to read her body of work to see what she feels is a proper story, but I'm afraid this is it, Ashwinder wise, so.... a prolific writer, then.

Yeah, I'm a little pissed off. If I don't like a story, I stop reading it. I don't trash it, I don't belittle it, I don't demoralise and discourage the author -  I just stop reading it.

Actually, it couldn't come at a worse time. I'm getting a little exhausted with the story, and my poor beta is nagging me to finish chapter 20. I think this means that DM and I really need to put in some quality time on it.

Comments

What I Think When I Read Reviews Like This

[pennswoods.livejournal.com]

Oddly Self-Important Reviewer: I can't even believe the amount of bandwidth this review is consuming. Most of the opinions expressed seem so utterly non-constructive as to be ridiculous, the examples used to support your position are trite, and the overuse of hyperbole and fandom cliches instead of actual concrit is self-defeating. I read through this entire review to try and give it a chance but it's just too underspecific and cliched for me to even bother trying to glean a modicum of useful critique that would help me to become a better writer.

Re: What I Think When I Read Reviews Like This

[teddyradiator.livejournal.com]

Now THAT's the response I wish I would have written!

Thank you, pennswoods. Sometimes you just have to look at the bigger picture.

I am not one who can't take constructive critisicm, and I hope I don't come across that way. I listen very hard to my beta and try to heed her excellent advice, and the advice of authors I read frequently and respect. But you are right; this wasn't the type of review sent to make me a better writer - it was just there to put me down. Thank you for that wonderful retort. I will treasure it forever.

[tally1302.livejournal.com]

Well said. I really don't understand some people in the writing community, it's like they get a kick out of putting others down. It's not just a question of taste in writing, it comes down to mutual respect. You don't trash others work. You just don't. If you don't like it either you don't read it or, if you have no choice but to read it (writing circle or some such) you give constructive criticism politely.

To make you and the muse feel better, I read this recently and it seemed to help a writer friend of mine who was having a crisis of confidence: http://jameskillick.blogspot.com/2011/04/five-brutal-truths-about-feedback-on.html

(LJ is going to mark me as a spammer if I keep pasting so many links in your comments, lol).

[teddyradiator.livejournal.com]

Thank you, tally, for that piece. I have kept it and will look at if often. I don't mind if people don't like what I do - some people just won't. Please give me suggestions, comments, criticisms, but do it because you want me to become better at what I do, not because you just want to put me down.

[voxangelus.livejournal.com]

This particular reviewer is very concerned with what she envisions as OOC, and needs everybody to know it. You're not the only one who has gotten a similar flame - her mother obviously didn't teach her any manners.

[teddyradiator.livejournal.com]

LOL - The very fact that they are together is OOC! Sheesh, Hermione/Severus fanfiction is OO flippin' C!

Oh well. I've just got to move onwards and upwards. And Chapter 20-wards, or my beta's going to divorce me.

[mimimanderly.livejournal.com]

Exactly! The very premise of their being together in the first place is just so OOC to begin with! MOST of fan fiction is OOC... certainly ALL of the slashy stuff. But who the bloody hell cares, really? Either you enjoy the story, or you don't. And if you don't, what in bloody hell are you reading it for? Just stop reading it. You don't have to give a long comment on WHY you don't like it.

This person just wants to criticize. It gives her a feeling of self-importance. She is more to be pitied, if she has so little confidence that she must pull someone else down to build herself up.

[teddyradiator.livejournal.com]

I know, Mimi darling - and she KEPT on emailing me! I stopped reading it. I decided I didn't need the upset, so the Hubs bought me a bottle of incredibly fantastic red wine and we enjoyed that instead!

I envy your ability to show mercy; I need to work on that. DahlraMuse has been very firm with me on this as well. He's been very stern at trying to get me back on track, more than he's ever been, bless him. I think he was offended, but more so, he was unhappy at the way I let it get to me.

To this end, he has started really giving me help with LML's next chapter, so that I can get back on track with the fic.

[mimimanderly.livejournal.com]

Oh, it was a difficult lesson for me, as well. Then I realized that forgiveness isn't about making the other person feel better; it's about making YOURSELF feel better. You criticize in others that which you loathe in yourself -- others merely serve as reflections of you. If she criticizes YOU so harshly, just imagine how self-critical she must be!

Though the e-mailing is a bit over-the-top. The best thing to do is either ignore or agree. Of the two, agreement takes the wind out of their sails. Just a brief "You may be right", and then what the hell can they argue about then?

[teddyradiator.livejournal.com]

Too true. I'm afraid the redneck in me wanted to defend myself, but I just stopped dealing with her.

It is true that I am the most critical of others what I hate in myself, and I try to remember that when I offer criticism myself. I have in the past, but I've always tried to couch it with the positive things I like about a fic, and how I think it would be enhanced if this or that were done.

I once wrote a writer and said, "I love this story - it has so many great things going for it and I look forward to seeing it develop. I would suggest that you work on your grammar and punctuation. It is a little distracting, and takes away from the positive aspects of the story when there are no periods, commas or any other punctuation."

The writer wrote back in perfect agreement (badly misspelled and with no sense of paragraph or a period in sight) and said she was desperately trying to get a beta and thanked me. I actually never went back to see if she had made any improvements, but I genuinely wanted to see her improve, because she had a good story idea.

[dianoram.livejournal.com]

Amen, sister! I do wish JKR had the strength to pair Hermione with Severus but since she didn't and settled her with Ron - you're here for us to heal the scars! :-)

Think about 477 comments (and counting) and forget about that one... any such comment without constructive criticism it's of no use. And even then - hey, this is your story, your rules. Take it or leave it.

[teddyradiator.livejournal.com]

Thank you, dianoram - well said, and I appreciate all the supportive comments I received. I was just taken aback at the vitriol of it. I have had concrit before, done with respect and encouragement, and I take it seriously and sometimes implement the advice, because I agree with it. But it was such an insult to the people who do like the story.

I love SS/HG - it is the only pairing that truly makes sense to me (although I do love a little SS/MM action now and again), but all fanfiction is OOC and it's there to be enjoyed. If you don't, hit the back button key and go somewhere else, I say.

Thank you for the 'your story, your rules'. My friend Sempra says 'Do What Thou Will Shall Be The Whole Of The Law'. We all write our hearts and the hearts of our Muses. When that is enjoyed, it thrills us and gives us encouragement. Why be so vindictive as to kill a person's heart?

[karelia.livejournal.com]

This isn't a review; it's a flame. Whenever I come across those on TPP, I start preaching manners.

[justpinkpastel.livejournal.com]

I really like your icon!

[karelia.livejournal.com]

Glad you do! :)

[teddyradiator.livejournal.com]

Thank you, Lady_karelia. I have never left a flame and never intend to. I have suggested that someone work a little on grammar and punctuation (on ff.net, you get that a lot), but I have always tried to explain the positive aspects of the story and why I wanted to give construction.

I would agree with many of the things cited; admittedly it is not my best work, and I'm not happy with the path it has taken, but...that's between me, the Muse and my superlative beta. We'll get this finished, by hook or by crook, and move on. I just was a little angry for the rudeness and pointlessness of her 'review'.

[justpinkpastel.livejournal.com]

*Picking jaw up off the floor* I cannot believe this! A SS/HG fic is OOC in itself! Hell, any fic is OOC due to the fact that whatever is written didn't actually happen in the book!

I did read her story, just to get some comparisons. First, she obviously doesn't know what a paragraph is. Second, she referred to Hermione's chest as "ta-ta's". Third, she had Severus forget he was naked and walk out of his rooms with students around (if that isn't OOC, I don't know what is).

I didn't bother writing a review for her story, because I don't believe in flaming someone's work. I believe in constructive critism, but there would be none coming from me.

I personally love your use of lyrics at the beginning of each chapter.

[teddyradiator.livejournal.com]

Nah, Pink. I'm not even going to bother reading it. It is one of those things that I say when I'm mad. I'm not going to stoop to that level. I'm just going to try to finish LML, and try to restore my own faith in the story.

That's a much harder task than trying to get over a nasty review.

[majorjune.livejournal.com]

The wonderful thing about fanfiction is that not everyone has to enjoy every story.

Exactly.

I think I've said it to you before that I'm not particularly a fan of the HG/SS ship, and I haven't read Lay Me Low, so I can't make any comments specifically on that story.

But I did read one of the entries of the drabble you recently posted here...

And I shouldn't have. I'm a victim of past abuse, and am diagnosed as having PTSD, and the abuse you wrote in that entry was a trigger for me. It definitely upset me, so much so that it caused nightmares later that night (dreams of others being abused, and me informing the victims that they all probably have PTSD and should seek therapy! :-P)

That said, I did read the entire entry to the end, even though I knew it was pushing a few trigger buttons.

And I didn't get the vapors over it; obviously I didn't comment on it or to you about it. There are people who enjoy reading that sort of thing, and you have every right to write it.

(You just might want to think about putting a warning at the beginning for people like me!) :-)

Yeah, I'm a little pissed off. If I don't like a story, I stop reading it. I don't trash it, I don't belittle it, I don't demoralise and discourage the author - I just stop reading it.

Yep. It might be one thing if the critiquer was a victim of abuse like I am, but then I'd question why they insisted on reading the whole thing.

But since you say they've written something called Debauched, Dissipated, and Dissolute, it sounds like they themselves are into that genre...in which case I think it's just a case of sour grapes, m'dear, don't sweat it.

I find it interesting that one of their complaints is in regards to "lyrics" that you have at the beginning of chapters? In my own fan fiction each chapter has a theme song (some chapters have more than one song), the lyrics have a particular meaning to what is happening in the story at the moment that the song is playing in the background...

At the end of each chapter I include the lyrics to the whole song, plus the name of the song, the artist, and the year it came out.

I actually had someone criticize me for that; they weren't criticizing the fact that I had some lyrics within the body of my story...they objected to me putting the complete lyrics to the chapter's song(s) at the very end of the chapter! They claimed it was confusing! :-P

Some people just have to say something negative; I'd love constructive criticism, in fact I'd prefer someone nitpicking in a constructive manner rather than the "Great chapter, post more soon!" type comments.

You have almost 500 positive comments and one negative one that is meaningless, as it has nothing constructive in it's criticism. Fuck 'em! ;-)

[teddyradiator.livejournal.com]

Thank you, June. I'm sorry that my story brought up some bad memories. I write to become a better writer, and as I have said here, I'm not saying I disagree with a lot of what she wrote.

I have lost motivation and faith in the story. I started a story that had a lot of good moments in it, with an idea of how it would end, and it took off in a totally different direction and now I don't know how to get back to the end.

I didn't think she was being constructive, merely destructive, and I think, looking at my inbox, she's written back, and I am not going to even read it. I'm not going to upset myself further with this pointless type of harassment.

[majorjune.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry that my story brought up some bad memories.

Thanks, but like I said, it is my issue and not yours, nor is it your readers'/fans'. I'd never dream of criticizing you for it just because that genre isn't my cup of tea.

But BTW, the reason that I did continue reading it all is because it is well-written! :-)

I have lost motivation and faith in the story. I started a story that had a lot of good moments in it, with an idea of how it would end, and it took off in a totally different direction and now I don't know how to get back to the end.

LOL!

Take it from someone who's been writing for over 4 decades -- one's stories do have a way of doing that! As do one's characters, also... ;-)

Maybe the story needs a new ending. Believe me, what you are feeling isn't all that unusual, I've often had to take a break from a story.

Hell, that's basically what's going on with my Woodstock Snape story at the moment; I was all gung-ho when I first started it -- way back in early 2008!

Back then I was sure that I'd have it finished -- meaning the story that spans multiple decades -- within a year at most, and have maybe 30 to 40 chapters at most.

The reality is, 3 years later the story's still in 1969, it's already up to 23 chapters (25, if you count the 2-part Prologue), and I realized that there is so very much I want and need to cover in the saga that I'll have to make each decade of the saga it's own separate story.

Meanwhile, RL intervenes, something which you yourself know well. You're undergoing a fair amount of trauma in RL right now, so give yourself a break, physically, emotionally, and from your story. When you finally emerge from the tunnel into the light -- and believe, you will, tho it may not seem like it right now -- you may go back to Lay Me Low with renewed enthusiasm, or you may decide it just no longer holds your interest, perhaps you'll find you have a fresh, shiny, spanking-new story idea to pursue instead! :-)

You have friends here, try to concentrate on that fact instead!

[teddyradiator.livejournal.com]

Oh, yes, June, my friends here are my Prozac! lol I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have my friends here. The Hubs is fantastically supportive and gets just as upset about these things (he was furious when he saw what she wrote, and even more furious that she continued to email me (I just deleted her (third) email without even reading it), and my RL friends know what I do and enjoy what I write, but this is where I'm completely understood, and my joys and sorrows are shared. I really, truly would not be the writer I am without this wonderful community of friends and I bless the day Droxy pimped me to her flist.

I really don't know what I'd do without y'all.

I know what you mean about getting bogged down. I normally write very organically, but this one just went off the rails. Funnily enough, I just finished an email with my beta, outlining what I wanted to do, and by the time I was finished, I was sort of getting a bit of a buzz to get back to the chapter and start writing again! So, maybe Mizriz Flambe is owed a thanks after all!

[majorjune.livejournal.com]

I normally write very organically, but this one just went off the rails

Hell, my stories often just jump onto a totally new track altogether! LOL

But the problem I'm having with Woodstock Snape is not one of jumping off the track...hell, the tracks were laid down via the challenge that got the whole thing started back in 2008! :-P

So I do have the basic itinerary laid out; what has surprised me is the scenery that has arisen along the way! ;-)

First off, I've really, really fallen in love with 9 year old Severus! I'm having a blast toying with him at that age, playing with his psyche as he basically finds himself in a type of "Severus in Wonderland" situation, and I'm allowing myself the luxury of showing someone who at that age was on the cusp of personality development...who had basic personality traits at that age, but whose further psychological development, and hence life, could have been so very different if he'd had warmth, love, and support.

(But since by the end of the saga he will be the sarcastic, snarky, bitter Snape we love from canon, obviously things aren't going to stay all warm and fuzzy for him!)

Secondly, I've really developed a love for the OCs in my story...all of whom have problems, and I've gotten emotionally attached to them all. Since I know why Severus will be sarcastic, snarky and bitter by the end of the saga, I know what will happen to/with these OCs that will bring about this change in Severus...and quite frankly, it's depressing! :-P

So that gets me bogged down sometimes -- as wonderful as I see certain scenes in future decades of the story, like I said I'm in love with my little 9 y.o. Snape and I think that's one reason I'm hesitant to have him leave the fun, funny, warm & fuzzy 1960s!

But I will; if only to get him to the erotic late 1970s! ;-)

[teddyradiator.livejournal.com]

Oooh ooh ooh, the late 70's. See Severus and I are about the same age, so I can definitely see him in the late 70's, all punk and sneer. You just know he listened to The Stranglers and The Clash. I can't see him being a mod, but I can defo see him as a real Sid Vicious type; all hangdog lust and insecurity and attitude.

Yep, I would've done him.

[majorjune.livejournal.com]

Oooh ooh ooh, the late 70's. See Severus and I are about the same age, so I can definitely see him in the late 70's, all punk and sneer. You just know he listened to The Stranglers and The Clash. I can't see him being a mod, but I can defo see him as a real Sid Vicious type; all hangdog lust and insecurity and attitude.

Oh, we are definitely on the same page! :-)

As I'd mentioned before, each of my chapters has at least one theme song, a song of the period.

This started me thinking about what styles of music would be appropriate for the 4 Hogwarts houses, and to me it was a no-brainer that Slytherin would be Punk, Alternative, and New Wave! lol

Gryffindors are the Mods, Top 40, Pop, Motown and Disco (even tho volume 2 of my saga is named Disco Snape, he will be taking advantage of the disco crowd, not be a part of it)...

Ravenclaw is folk, jazz, classical, and electronic/new age...

Hufflepuff is Heavy Metal and Funkadelic (they want to be cool) lol

In my story, Sev's erotic experiences will span "true love" to orgies. He'll never become a Sid Vicious type in my story, but experiences of the late 70s and early 80s will definitely make him "all punk and sneer", and he'll basically be someone who's just looking out for #1 (remember he will be experiencing The Greedy 80s right after the Sexy/Hedonistic 70s....

[teddyradiator.livejournal.com]

I love how you've used the musical styles to represent the houses. You didn't put a foot wrong there.

Whew - I can't wait to see Sev's 'erotic experiences'. Yep, there are times I write him as a hedonistic horndog, then I also like to write him a little innocent, a man who hasn't had many lovers, but wants to be good. Sometimes I write him as a celibate. I go with Sempraseverus' attitude; he is ours now - canon be damned. We will take him wherever he leads us, according to his whim.

[majorjune.livejournal.com]

I love how you've used the musical styles to represent the houses. You didn't put a foot wrong there.

Well, I haven't actually used the styles, since in my story Sev's been transported to America, and won't get back to England until 1976 (and only for a short visit), and then returns to Spinner's End in the 90s...

IOW, no Hogwarts for him, he'll have "alternative" schooling/learning experiences.

It was just as I did research (yes, research) for songs of the various eras to use as chapter theme songs, it just got me started thinking what sort of music would be appropriate for each Hogwarts house...IOW, knowing the various temperments of the students in the houses, what sort of music would they be drawn to?

And to me the obvious choice for nihilistic Slytherin was punk, etc.

And of course Gryffs would be drawn to stuff where they could be the center of attention, they would definitely be the disco divas! LOL

Ravenclaws would be attracted to "intellectual" type music, they're definitely the beatnik/coffeehouse crowd.

And Hufflepuff -- well, they DO have "puff" in their name, they're right off the kitchen (easy to satisfy those munchies), and they'd definitely want to seem "cool"....

In my mindverse, the Hogwarts house elves join the Hufflepuffs for secret parties, supplying not only the food and beverages, but the "puff"... ;-)

Whew - I can't wait to see Sev's 'erotic experiences'.

Well in my story he'll first lose his virginity in a loving relationship that will eventually turn sour. He then ends up in Manhattan in the late 70's -- Studio 54, and the various sex clubs that were popular then.

Sometimes I write him as a celibate.

That's actually how I see canon Snape, and how Sev will basically end up in my story (even if he's technically in a relationship) -- he'll eventually reach a point of "been there, done that, it no longer interests me..."

[morethansirius.livejournal.com]

Hey, hitting 1 out of 3 will get you in the Baseball Hall of Fame. You've managed 476 out of 477 and that's awesome! It's a flame. The review is all about the flamer, not your story. Ignore the trolls and smile at those 476 reviews written by normal people who appreciate your hard work.

PS There's a link on her Ashwinder author's page to more stories over on FFN. Mostly parodies and not SSHG. I can't be bothered to read stories written by rude, nasty reviewers. I cannot tell you how amused I am that a parody writer would be lecturing you about being OOC and trite. Alrighty, then.

[teddyradiator.livejournal.com]

You know, I always love getting a message from you and your 'happy little fangirl' icon!!!

Thank you, thank you for putting things into a little better perspective for me. She is still emailing me! I just deleted her last email - I'm not even going to waste my time getting upset over her.

Yep, a parody writer. Hmm. Well, it has made me roll up my sleeves and rub my hands in anticipation of the next chapter of the story. It has been languishing lately, but I feel a little more rejuvenated about it - so I guess thanks are in order to her, huh?

[bambu345.livejournal.com]

So, I went off to read this woman's story, and hit the 'back' button after the third paragraph. It was the description of Hermione tossing her 'honeybutter, toffee (with a side of whipcream) hair' that did me in.

No, not someone whose critique I would take to heart, I'm afraid.

Stick to your guns.

[teddyradiator.livejournal.com]

Thanks, Bambu. I know this isn't the greatest story in fanfiction, but I do think my writing style is good enough to keep working at it. Yep, I don't think I'm going to worry too much about it.

Having friends looking out for you helps even more ;)

And it's got me a little more rejuvenated on the story - it's sort of, well, I'll show YOU! lol

Actually, it was just getting my head around it a little more. I think I've actually got my second wind on the fic now!

[beffeysue.livejournal.com]

I was taken aback when I read your previous post that contained a copy of la critique. Uh, yeah. I love Lay Me Low. Does that mean I'm crazy? Nuh uh... only so far as I am crazy for your writing.

Hugs you with huge hugs!

Beffey

[teddyradiator.livejournal.com]

As Ayerf says, my story, my rules. I was taken aback, because I felt that one of the things she was doing was insulting the people who had reviewed the story.

I'm always thrilled that people like what I do, of course, and I do take criticism seriously. In my second fic, a reviewer wrote (quite rightly) that inserting a song lyric in the middle of a very erotic scene was not only unnecessary but distracting. She said she was riveted to the story, totally engulfed in it, then the lyrics just derailed the pace, mood and flow of the story.

She was respectful, encouraging and, most of all, she was right. I went back and took them out, and it strengthened the story immensely, and she still reads and enjoys my stories, and still reviews. She sometimes still disagrees with something I've written, but she does it in a way that is meant to be constructive and encouraging, and I never take offense at what she says.

There's a right way and a wrong way to concrit, and this was waaay wrong, and I don't appreiciate. It not only insulted me, but the 476 reviews that liked the story as well.

[dharkapparition.livejournal.com]

I hope you had a bag of marshmallows available! Hmmm, a Hershey bar and grahm crackers too! S'mores are a tasty snack to prepare over that flame.

[teddyradiator.livejournal.com]

Sheesh, she kept emailing - I just stopped reading - no sense in getting myself in a pissing contest with someone who speaks there peace.

[ayerf.livejournal.com]

...I hate 'reviews' like that. I certainly don't understand why they bother to review something when they have nothing positive to say - concrit has its place, but there's nothing constructive I can see about that criticism. I'd advise ignoring them, but that means the irritating things hang around on the unanswered reviews page, like one I have. I should probably get a mod to remove it, but can't help feeling that would put them to too much bother.

[teddyradiator.livejournal.com]

Ayerf, do what I do when I get a copy (sometimes I get duplicate reviews on Ash - I guess it's a blip or something. Hit response, put a space in it and hit respond. They leave your unanswered review page, you haven't given them the oxygen of acknowledgment, and you don't have to put up with them anymore.

This one kept emailing me! I finally just deleted her replies before I read them, just so I wouldn't get upset all over again. Derelict Author is definitely someone who likes to indulge in a pissing contest, and I wasn't going to provide her with one more second of my time. She finally stopped after I refused to reply to her.

[ayerf.livejournal.com]

That could be one way of doing it... but I can't help wondering if any response - even a non-response - would just set the idiot off again. I suppose there is also Shiv's recommended method with such things: 'Thank you' when you actually mean 'Fuck you'.

Ignoring her is definitely the best thing to do - go you. I'm glad she stopped in the end.

[dianoram.livejournal.com]

I think it must be envy on her part. Pure and simple.

And I hate it when people troll the stories I love - and Severus, don't touch Severus!!

Even that remark about Lass - for example I saw him in that moment as a man from Manchester, who is so overwhelmed with Hermione that he reverts to his dialect then - I thought it was romantic - and I kept imagining Alan Rickman's voice and swooning. But that's me :-))

I actually had major problems with Hermione ending up with Ron - because they don't share any interests at all. So why couldn't she have a nice life with a guy who is her intellectual equivalent so they can both evolve. And as she gets older - it makes no difference that Severus is 20 years older than her. Hermione is basically 18 going on 30... That's my story and I'm sticking to it. :-)) So for me - some fanfiction stories are canon to me :-)))

Please don't let this affect your Muse. That would be such a shame.

[teddyradiator.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much. Yes, I think of Severus as that milltown boy from Manchester, and yes, he would call her that, and yes, when he was in quiet unguarded moments, he would revert back to his roots. You can bet he cultivated his pear-shaped tones over time, he wasnt' born with them! Even AR was just a council house boy from London.

Oh, yeah, I heard AR saying it. His voice has been in my head YEARS before HP came along - I've been a fan of his since he stole Robin Hood: POT out from under Kevin Costner!

As far as Hermione ending up with Ron - agree with you 150%. Ever since I started reading fanfiction (about a year ago - I'm a newbie, really), that pairing totally made sense to me. Bugger the age difference, they are perfect for one another.

I think the incomparable Aurette said it best in her fic Side Effects, when she has Ron tell Harry, "Someone needed to get naked with Hermione, the girl was going mental. Hermione and Snape? Weird, yes, but I bet he could actually make her happy; he's almost smart enough for her. She could use a bit of happy, eh? And if he doesn't? Then we kill him. Alright?"

I could never in a million years have put it better myself.