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TheHubs™ and I are celebrating our 15th wedding anniversary today. It barely seems possible it's been 16 years since we met, and yet at the same time hard to remember a time when we weren't together. I am the owner of two disastrous previous marriages; this is the one that took. My first husband was an ineffectual, irritating alcoholic; he wasn't a bad man, just a pain in the arse to be around. I understand that he's happily married and living in his native Wisconsin now. I hope he has found the happiness he was never going to find with me.
The second was a great lesson in being careful what you ask for, you just may get it. I wanted excitement, I wanted thrilling sex, I wanted spice. I got it all in the form of a dangerous, narcissistic predator. He died about 18 months ago, and the world is a brighter place for it. I am only too happy to speak ill of the dead - he deserved all the rancour I am capable of producing. He left me battered and so broken it's a wonder all the King's horses and all the King's men were able to put me together again. Poor Hubs™ - he inherited so much of my baggage when we got together I'm suprised he didn't have to pay import duties on it. Thankfully, he was patient enough, and, dare I say it, loved me enough to pull me through it all. I used all that PTSD as a crutch for a long time; now I am stronger, and wiser, and a little more protective of myself. I've learned to love myself, and in doing so, I learned to love everyone properly. I still make mistakes, but at least now I know what the warning signs are.
We kept it low-key today; we worked, then came home and made chili with baked potatoes. Chocolate cake was our big indulgence. He's just returned from seeing to Lucy the Dog, and I've just come from the shower where I became a brunette again all the way to the roots. Life is pretty good.
The second was a great lesson in being careful what you ask for, you just may get it. I wanted excitement, I wanted thrilling sex, I wanted spice. I got it all in the form of a dangerous, narcissistic predator. He died about 18 months ago, and the world is a brighter place for it. I am only too happy to speak ill of the dead - he deserved all the rancour I am capable of producing. He left me battered and so broken it's a wonder all the King's horses and all the King's men were able to put me together again. Poor Hubs™ - he inherited so much of my baggage when we got together I'm suprised he didn't have to pay import duties on it. Thankfully, he was patient enough, and, dare I say it, loved me enough to pull me through it all. I used all that PTSD as a crutch for a long time; now I am stronger, and wiser, and a little more protective of myself. I've learned to love myself, and in doing so, I learned to love everyone properly. I still make mistakes, but at least now I know what the warning signs are.
We kept it low-key today; we worked, then came home and made chili with baked potatoes. Chocolate cake was our big indulgence. He's just returned from seeing to Lucy the Dog, and I've just come from the shower where I became a brunette again all the way to the roots. Life is pretty good.
