Thank you so much - I have missed my friends here so much, and added that guilt. I should have been a Catholic, the way I perform these little guilt trips on myself. Hech finally said, "If you apologise for one more thing I'm gonna kick your ass!" I really needed this trip to get some perspective. But I am very grateful to have been missed while I was away stressing myself into a puddle. I would think to myself, "If I go onto LJ and talk about it, I know my friends will give me a boost. I was just too exhausted to do it.